Kenapa Kita Kene Ajar Anak Kita Pasal Seks.

My Baby Boy!

Salam,

1. Semua mak bapak kalau boleh nak anak2 kita maintain kecik dan comey forever. Maintain their innocence. But lumrah alam, diaorang akan one day become adults and leave us to live their own lives.

2. So sejak kecik2 lagi, semua parents are racing against time, to prepare their kids for the future, primarily by giving them the proper education.

3. Malangnya, salah satu ilmu yg ramai mak bapak ngelat tanak ajar anak2 adalah ilmu seks. Malu konon. Taboo. Kotor. "Kau belum cukup umur". "Ni cerita org tua2". "Besar2 nanti tau la".

4. So they leave it to the kids to discover apakah itu seks by themselves. Apakah kebodohan ini? Kau ingat belajar pasal seks ni macam belajar naik basikal jatuh bangun sendiri ke? Belajar masak2 main download resepi drp internet dan blasah try sendiri?

5. Kalau belajar subjek2 lain kau boleh antar tuisyen, ngaji pulak kau boleh cari ustad, tapi SEKS kau biar dia belajar sorang2? Komonla. Basuh berak pon kau sendiri ajar kan?

6. Jadi, as Muhammad turn 12 yo this year, aku berazam utk ajar dia pasal seks bila next time aku jumpa dia kat Malaysia nanti iAllah.
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Ajar Apa?

1. Ramai org salah anggap bila aku ckap aku nak ajar anak aku seks, diaorang dok bayang aku nak ajar sexual teknik, foreplay, position bagai. Hoi. Kau lebam?

2. Apa yang kita perlu ajar adalh basic je bro. Mula2 kita cakap apakah perubahan2 yg berlaku pada badan diaorang bila diaorang baligh. Sentuh skit pasal bila dah baligh ni, buku catatan akan di buka, so kene jaga dosa pahala dah start drp time tu.

Dah ada dlm buku teks darjah 6 anak aku pon. Tak payah susah2.

Punggung melebar! Haha

3. Pastu baru citer apakah itu seks, kenapa kita buat seks dan cemana seks boleh menghasilkan baby. Thats it.

4. Teknik2 kuak dada, kuak kupu2, kuak lentang, side parking, backhand smash, jurus 1Malaysia, Rosmah Lemah, itu semua tu, pepandai dia lah belajar nanti. Takan aku nak ajar plak. Kang terbayang dok menteknik kan bakal bini dia plak, tak ke awkward.
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Kenapa Kena Ajar?

1. First and foremost, kita kene ajar anak2 kta pasal seks supaya dia dapat identify sex crimes, if somebody want to or nauzubillah had perpetrated it to them. Who knows somebody telah pedo or molest anak2 kita. So bila dia dah tahu, boleh lah dia ngadu kat kita if anything happens,
"Eh Papa, aritu somebody telah buat camni kat kita punya". Time to beli pistol.

2. Secondly, kita kene ajar sebab kalau kau sendiri tak ajar, dia eventually akan dengar drp sumber2 yg lain. Kalau sumber itu elok macam drp buku teks ke, drp ustad ke gitu tak pe lah. Tapi biasanya sumber2 yang anak2 kita akan belajar adalh drp sumber yg tak boleh pakai macam drp kawan2 dan internet.

3. Teringat lagi kat jiran aku, masa tu dia form 2 gitu, tetiba citer kat aku yg masa tu baru 8-9 tahun,
"Mu nok tau rogol tu gappo? Rogol tu bilo hok jatey masuk ko hok tino pahtu jatey kencing dalm hok tino dan tino kencing dalm hok jatey". Euww. Apa main kencing2 ni. Tanak lah jadi perogol cenggitu.

4. Aku malas nak mencarut sbb dah janji aritu (sumber), tapi this misinformation telah mindfucked aku sampailah aku form 1 dan akhirnya belajar pasal seks yg sebenar dlm subjek sains. Jadi sorry lah bro. Aku tanak anak aku jadi cam aku. Mindfucked by some idiot!
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Bila Kene Ajar?

1. This is actually very hard to judge. Aku rasa bila dia dah mula dapat "sexual awareness" boleh start kot pelan2. But my first ever hard-on was masa aku 4 y.o kot, waktu terusha bra hitam sorang nurse ni masa aku kene hospitalised. Tetiba, "Kelas Berdiri!". Tapi takan lah nak belajar pasal seks masa 4 yo kot!

2. Or kau boleh tunggu sampai anak2 kau dah mula "sexually curious". As they grow up, they will eventually heard or read istilah2 taboo macam "rogol/rape", "cabul/molest", "liwat", "homo", "gay" etc, kan? So bila dia dah start tanya kita pasal terms2 tersebut, kau boleh lah explain time tu. (aku pernah blog pasal istilah2 ni. Baca sini)

3. Tapi aku sendiri tak buat, sebab waktu Muhammad start tanya aku tu, dia baru 10 yo kot. Tak sampai hati aku.  Haha. Akibatnya, dia telah buat apa yang aku risau kan selama ni. Dia carik info sendiri.

4. So, oneday, dia telah bukak buku ensaiklopedia mana ntah, pastu dia confronted bini aku,
" Now I know, where does the baby come from! Its when the sperm from the boys meet the eggs from the girls. But I still don't understand how the sperms get to met the eggs?"
Fuhhh! Lega bini aku. Haha.

Baca pasal sperm mmg laju. Acu try ngajii....

5. But you can delay the inevitable only for so much. Few days ago, my wife telah terkantoikan dia search for something, on her phone. Nampak kat history. But I don't blame him at all. He is just curious. The blame lies entirely on me. Arghhhh! Wish I am in Malaysia now, and explaining everything to him. Sorry bro.
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The End Of Innocence

1. Of course, selepas kita cakap pasal bende ni dgn diaorang, it will change everything between us and them. Konfem pastu anak2 kita akan pandang slack je kat kita bila kita dok dekat2 mak dia. Nak buat camne.  Knowledge will open their eyes.

2. Then Muhammad will know the answers to all his taboo questions. For example, what I was actually doing waktu aku "mengemas katil" dgn Rozita or soalan klakar dia, "Why I need to sleep by my own in my own room, but Papa can sleep with Mama? Papa pon dah big boy, he should sleep by himself tooo!". Haha."..Err. Mama is afraid to sleep by herself la. Papa teman jee..."

3. Or the answer to his favourite subject, the "pubic hair", that had bothered him ever since he was 8 yo bila ada mat salleh cilakak mana ntah pergi bogel depan2 kita org kat changing room di swimming pool. After that, masuk2 kereta je, letih aku menjawap soalan2, "Papa. Do you have hair on your weewee?", "Am I gonna get hair on my weewee to?", "When I am gonna get hair on my weewee?".

4. Tengah aku bersilat sakan, nak try jawap soalan Muhammad tu sesopan mungkin, tetiba terdengar suara kecik tapi kuat dariapda seat belakang,
"I DON"T HAVE HAIR ON MY WEE WEE!!!".
Demm. Tengah seronok cerita pasal pubic hair, terlupa kat blakang ada.....4 yold Husna. Alamakkkk!

Sekian Mekasih Wassalam